Third Culture Kid Dating; adults who have spent their developmental years outside their parent's culture

Sangria and Closeness Among TCKs

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What is it about meeting other TCKs that creates that instant bond?  Last Thursday, we shared sangria at a TCK Dating Event at Salvador & Amanda here in London, and it was interesting to see how quickly everyone was able to find commonalities and get along.  The conversations I had with others at the event jumped from one place to another so quickly – we went on what felt like a million tangents.  By the end of the night, you could tell that everyone felt welcomed and comfortable around each other.

It made me think about why that is. If we haven’t lived in the same countries, speak different languages and possibly don’t even have the same interests (besides perhaps the obvious: travel!), why is it that we get on so well? Of course, there will be the odd person with whom you don’t seem to be able to bond with, TCK or not. But, the vast majority, have plenty to chat about, seem to relax more, and don’t seem preoccupied with how they act around other TCKs.

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I think there could be a multitude of different reasons, but these are the ones I came up with.  For one, I think that when you speak to a TCK, you know that they’ve lived in a different country and in some way have experienced a similar upbringing to you. This belief and knowledge seems to bring us closer. The second part is knowing that a TCK will not question the way you pronounce something or the way you use your hands to show enthusiasm when telling a story. And the reason for that? Well, it’s because a TCK knows that 1) they themselves have also picked up unusual customs from the countries they grew up in so it’s nothing to be embarrassed about and 2) they are more likely to have met plenty of multicultural people through international schools, extensive travel, or through their family and friends.  Not to say that non-TCKs haven’t – of course some have! But, with TCKs, there’s a higher chance they’ve met people from all over the world throughout their childhood.

I do wonder though what it is about TCKs chatting together that makes us jump from one topic to the next and go on so many different tangents. Why do you think that is?

After a fantastic evening of Spanish Sangria, we’ve decided to move to Belgian Beers and Fries for our TCK and Expat Event on March 26th! I can’t wait to see the connections and friendships that grow from these events! I always love meeting new people, (could have something to do with moving schools every couple of years growing up!) and I’m looking forward to connecting with other adult Third Culture Kids living and working here in London!


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