Third Culture Kid Dating; adults who have spent their developmental years outside their parent's culture

Shaking it up!

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Have you ever tried to narrow down when you become restless?  As someone who’s moved around a lot growing up, I got used to having a pretty intense change every couple of years as a kid.  The thing is, as an adult, if you have settled somewhere, you often have quite a static lifestyle (there are exceptions, of course!).

If you think about it, most humans are creatures of habit so we try and keep some sense of stability. Very often people have one job that they go to every day. I know there are exceptions and that some have a very varied lifestyle. But often, it’s that nine-to-five or shift job that you go to every day.  It can start feeling quite repetitive and monotone as the weeks, months, years roll by in that same way.  If you then look at the friends that you meet with and the social events you go to, you might start realising you’ve been going to the same place again and again. You’re being loyal to one local pub or a fantastic little restaurant around the corner! Or so you tell yourself. Every other Friday evening, you realise you’re on the same street again. Eating at that asian noodle place. It’s easy. You know it will be great quality and service. So you don’t change it up.  You go to the gym and do your ‘routine’, you know what I’m talking about? The one you haven’t changed up in ages? Cardio for 25-35 minutes, a bit of stretching, and maybe some weights (if you’re feeling adventurous).

What I mean is that you can very quickly get yourself stuck in a rut by simply following a very human trait of wanting stability and routine.  But, for those of us, who can very easily get restless and antsy (me), this sort of behaviour is bad news! You slowly start feeling like you need to run off to another country. Take a 3-month trip in South America. Quit your job!

So that’s why, especially in the winter, when it’s cold, grey and rainy (at least here in London!), I need to remind myself to shake it up.  Every time I’m leaning towards going to that same bar I’ve been to a million times, I have to force myself out of it and think what’s new, what area have I never been to before?  When I want to do the same old work-out, I have to stop myself. Why don’t I watch a fun youtube video to get some fresh inspiration instead?  If I keep picking up the same newspaper, I force myself to pick up a different one.  If I’m walking to the station, I tell myself to take a different route.  I sign up to a rock-climbing session, a street dance class, anything different that will get me out of my comfort zone! It doesn’t cost me anything (or hardly anything), and it means that I won’t get to that what feels inevitable point in time where I want to pack all my bags and move countries!

Do you ever feel like you’re in a bit of a rut?  What are the signs? And what are your ways of shaking out of it?


This is me shaking things up by going to Wilderness Festival in August and swimming in a (very cold) lake!


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